Blog by Sumana Harihareswara, Changeset founder
On Reciprocity: One To Many To One
Hi, reader. I wrote this in 2009 and it's now more than five years old. So it may be very out of date; the world, and I, have changed a lot since I wrote it! I'm keeping this up for historical archive purposes, but the me of today may 100% disagree with what I said then. I rarely edit posts after publishing them, but if I do, I usually leave a note in italics to mark the edit and the reason. If this post is particularly offensive or breaches someone's privacy, please contact me.
How can I reconcile the awesome company or person you are with the fact that you made a partnership with little ol' me?
Could it be that I am exactly as important to you as you are to me? Which imbalance direction would worry me more?
How do I filter through all my 2am insecurity so I can match my behavior towards you, and my behavior in general, to the principles I care about?
What do we owe each other? Is it even useful to talk about obligation or deservingness? When am I beating myself up as a lazy substitute for treating you fairly? Is asking that just recursive meta-martyrdom?
As open as you are, as much as you let me backstage, will my insane curiosity about your inner life ever be fulfilled? Will I ever know you?
Could it be that you want to know me just as deeply as I want to know you?